Sex Education Isn't Controversial, It's a Necessity

Teacher at a whiteboard pointing to aa drawing of a condom and the worlds sexual health as students look on.
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In this op-ed, Bogi Szalai, a youth ambassador at AMAZE, explores the need for comprehensive and inclusive sex education.

I’m 15, and though I’m a sophomore in high school, I have never learned about consent in school. I have never learned about healthy relationships in a sex education class. I have definitely never had access to any LGBTQ+ inclusive education in my classes, like what prevention and protection might look like for LGBTQ+ young people.

Here's what I have learned about sex in school: In fifth grade I was living in New York and learned about anatomy and puberty, lessons that were informative and helpful as I was beginning to go through puberty myself. By seventh grade, my family moved to West Virginia, and, while I did get some sex ed there, it wasn’t up to par. Instead of learning about ways to practice safe, consensual sex, we mostly learned about how we might contract STIs — without mention of how we could prevent them. In New Mexico, where I live now, I’ve had some sex education, and some teachers who give helpful information, but not nearly enough. My state requires sex ed be taught in schools, but abstinence must be stressed, and it’s not required to be inclusive

What I’ve really learned from moving around the country is that the sex education you receive depends on where you live, but that’s not okay. As a teenager and a human being, I can tell you that sex education is very important for everyone — and too few of us are getting it.

Worsening the lack of sex education across the country, I’ve seen many harmful comments lately about sex education efforts online. It’s infuriating to hear people say sex education isn’t appropriate for young people, or even call sex educators predators who want to harm children, when that’s the actually the opposite of the truth. The little sex education I did get was never inappropriate, it was information I needed to be safe and empowered in my body — information I need more of. Mentions of sexuality and gender were never in an effort to sway my own identity — just information about humanity.

We’re up against so much right now: Next month, the Supreme Court is poised to overturn Roe v. Wade, which protects our right to abortion. Across the country, lawmakers are attacking the rights of trans young people, banning them from school sports and taking away their access to gender-affirming care. As teenagers, we’re also just trying to understand the physical, social, and emotional changes we’re experiencing as we grow up. My peers and I need honest, factual sex education to navigate all of this. That sex education must also be inclusive of LGBTQ+ people’s experience, which means it can’t just be focused on what cis, straight kids need, but that it takes into account all sexual orientations and gender identities, includes examples of positive, healthy LGBTQ+ relationships, and doesn’t include harmful stereotypes.

I’ve been lucky: My parents both work in science, and I have always been able to openly ask them questions about sex, sexuality, and relationships, and they have always been honest with me. I have had some teachers who have gone above and beyond to give us the information we needed when our curriculum didn’t cover it. I’ve been introduced to fun, factual resources like AMAZE’s animated videos which are made to give young people like me the information we need and want about sex, our bodies, and relationships. But this has been a patchwork education that I’ve collected in various states and across platforms. I know this isn’t the experience of so many young people across the country, who are being denied information that we need to succeed academically and for our overall well-being; information that can help us show respect for all people including ourselves, and that actually has life-saving potential.

When I look around at my peers, we’re all just trying to figure out who we are. Many of us are trying to be allies and create safe spaces for each other. Some of us are navigating LGBTQ+ identities. We’re watching our bodies change and experiencing new emotions. All of us need help and information on our journeys, and we don’t need misinformation and shame.

We should be learning sex education as we do math or science or anything else – gradually over our whole K-12 education, building on what we’ve learned and learning new concepts when we’re ready. We should be taught real skills for making informed decisions about our futures. Our schools need to be safe, affirming, and inclusive for all of us. From communicating about consent, to learning about various methods of protection and understanding the options available if you get pregnant, the kind of sex education we receive has a major impact on our lives and just like any other parts of our education, we need it to be able to succeed and thrive.

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